Minimalist Workout No. 1
If you’re busy, finding time to work out can be an ordeal. You want to get bigger or stronger, but your schedule is tighter than a starving anaconda’s grip on a deer. To make get where you want to be, you’ll have to strip away all of the fluff. Anything that’s not absolutely essential to getting you where you want to go has to be tossed out. With that in mind, I’ve written a few workouts that you can do twice a week, from warm-up to finish, in less than 45 minutes. This one is particularly good for gaining strength and keeping you from becoming one of those people who gets winded going up a flight of stairs.
First, let’s start with the warm-up. You’ll do the same warm-up for all of the following workouts. This consists of doing 3-5 minutes of any cardio (jumping rope, treadmill, jogging, etc.), then stretching your hip flexors, groin, and lats for 30 seconds each for two rounds. If the whole thing takes more than five to seven minutes, you’re not focused. You’ve only got 45 minutes at most for your workout, so put away the rectangular electronic distraction and get moving. Some would say that this is too little warming up and I agree. That said, we’re low on time and need to be extremely picky about what you do. Since most people sit on their butts a lot and sleep on their sides, the most likely things to be tight are the aforementioned muscle groups: hip flexors, groin, and lats. Once that’s done, it’s time for the workout.
There are two days to this. The format is the same, but the first three exercises are different. The last one is the same for both days. Let’s have a look at A Day in depth so you can see exactly how this thing works. Once you’ve finished the warm-up, start warming up the squat. In between each warm-up set, do three box jumps (or long jumps.) Focus on being as explosive as possible. Do not do that thing where you are jumping on a box so high it becomes an exercise in pulling your knees into your ears. All you’re doing is stroking your ego. There are no gold medals for “highest box jump” at the Olympics, I promise. If you know your 1RM, work up to three sets of five reps at 80%. If you don’t know your 1RM, add weight until it feels like an 8 on a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being “nearly impossible, but still doable.”) Make sure you’re putting as much force with good form into the bar as possible. You’re trying to teach your body to recruit as much muscle as possible.
Once you’ve completed the squatting, it’s time to move on to the bench press. Here, we’ll repeat the process, this time with no jumps. Instead, what we’ll do is put a set of 10 rows in between each set of bench press. For the bench, keep adding weight until you hit 80% or 8 out of 10. Once you get there, do three sets of five reps. For the rows, use a weight where it’s hard, but still possible, to get all 10 reps.
Now that the strength part is finished, on to conditioning. This conditioning is dead simple, meaning it’s simple and you’ll be dead at the end of it. Grab a kettlebell that’s lighter than what your ego says you should grab. I recommend starting with a 16kg (35lbs) bell for gentlemen and a 12kg (26lbs) bell for ladies. Do a couple of sets of five reps just to warm up the movement. Once that’s done, grab a stopwatch, timer, or any other device where you can see seconds and minutes tick by, bringing you ever closer to your imminent demise. Hit start and do 10 swings. Rest until the clock hits the top of the next minute (1:00.) Do 10 swings. Rest until the clock hits the top of the next minutes (2:00.) Do 10 swings. When the clock hits 10 minutes, you’re finished. You should have 100 swings under your belt.
For B Day, follow the same format only you replace the squat, bench press, and row with the deadlift, press and pull-down. You might be wondering how to progress from week to week. For everything but the swing, add five pounds to the previous week’s weight as long as you got all the reps and your form was still great. If you squatted 105 last week, squat 110 this week. If your form was compromised, do not add weight. If you couldn’t hit all the reps, do not add weight. Repeat last week’s weight. I know, your ego won’t like it, but you’re already pressed for time/recovery in the rest of your life. This is not the time to be doing anything stupid. As for the swings, if you successfully completed all the reps in the previous workout, add 1 rep per minute. This means that if you got all 100 reps on the first day, do 11 reps per minute next workout (110 reps total.) Once you can do 200 total reps, move to the next size kettlebell and start at 100 reps again. This might sound slow, but if you succeed every single workout, you’ll get to the next size bell in five weeks.
Don’t be fooled by the lack of fancy stuff and shiny new exercises, this workout is great for anybody who wants to get stronger and have good conditioning in general. If you’re looking to compete in powerlifting or run an ultramarathon, this is not for you. However, if you’re going through medical school, have a very busy worklife, or are a new parent, then this is the program for you. Simple, effective, and quick. We all have busy times in our lives, but finding an hour and a half a week for fitness is well within the reach of even the busiest of people.
